When it comes to rejection, there are tons of songs out there that tackle that topic. However, it seems as if most of them showcase rejection in a negative light – either by the person doing the rejecting being kind of harsh about it, or the person on the other end being really hurt. But, from my vantage point, there aren’t a ton of songs that showcase the person doing the rejecting in a positive light and doing the rejection in a kind, caring way.
Then comes New Edition’s classic track, “You’re Not My Kind of Girl.” Released in 1988 as part of their album Heart Break, the song tackles the sensitive subject—telling someone they’re not a perfect match for them—and turns it into a catchy, smooth song that listeners still can appreciate today. Let’s discuss why this track is easily one of the most likable rejection songs I’ve ever heard.
The Art of Gentle, Musical Rejection
At its core, “You’re Not My Kind of Girl” is a song about the complex and delicate task of explaining to someone that, although you admire and respect them, the romantic feelings simply aren’t there. Rather than creating a harsh breakup song, New Edition turns it into more of an honest conversation, which is kind of cool, considering that, typically, most R&B songs are a bit more dramatic(everyone doesn’t have to sing all dramatic in the rain, LOL).
The song emphasizes the fact that, although the guy thinks the girl is pretty, dresses well, and would be a great catch, she simply isn’t the one for him. This can be appreciated because it’s a relatable subject – everything isn’t “I hate you” or “I can’t live without you.” Some situations are more complicated, and sometimes people aren’t on the same page romantically, but that’s okay. That doesn’t mean anyone is bad, ugly, or anything negative – you just aren’t for them. Not to mention that the song is upbeat and something that listeners can dance to. Most of the time, songs like these have a slower tempo and a lower key, and are less happy-sounding. “You’re Not My Kind of Girl” isn’t the happiest song, but it doesn’t give it a sad ending.
New Edition’s Vocal Performances
In my opinion, Ralph Tresvant was the right choice to lead the song. His higher, softer tone makes the letdown much less painful and more genuine. Although Johnny Gill can be heard doing his classic rifts and runs in the background, which adds great character to the song, I think his vocals would have been a bit too strong for the song’s subject matter. Plus, it could even be argued that the song may be a bit “off-brand” for Gill’s style. Johnny Gill specializes in love songs – I don’t know if a rejection song would have made the most sense, coming from a man many women would fantasize about being with.
I can also appreciate the conversation that’s depicted in the song with the guys talking about how they don’t understand why Ralph doesn’t like the girl. Again, it’s a relatable aspect of the song – most folks have experienced not really being into someone or breaking up with someone, and their friends or family are like, “What? You don’t like him/her? What’s wrong with you?!” This is precisely what they did in the song. Nonetheless, Ralph stuck to his guns, mentioning that it’s not fair to waste her time, hoping she finds someone who can appreciate her.
Why It Still Resonates Today
“You’re Not My Kind of Girl” is easily one of my personal favorites from New Edition, but I think many other fans and listeners like this song because of how real it is. As I stated earlier, the song is upbeat, there’s no villain or broken-hearted individual, and it’s presented respectfully. Not to mention that the production and lyrics are spot-on. Overall, it’s just a good song!
This song can be a fun dance tune or a healing mechanism for someone healing from a rejection or breakup. It’s even perfect for someone trying to get up the nerve to have this conversation with someone. “You’re Not My Kind of Girl” is a multipurpose tune, and sometimes that’s just what we need.
What are your thoughts on New Edition’s “You’re Not My Kind of Girl?” What’s your favorite New Edition song? Sound off in the comments!
